Bachelor 18: Juan Pablo Gets Massages, Gold Stars, and Unimpressed Women

bachelorLast season, Desiree sent sexy Juan Pablo home to focus on the other men but this time around Juan Pablo gets his pick of the 27 women producers rounded up. On Sunday night, ABC previewed the show with a one hour episode introducing the bachelor and showing some of his bachelorettes getting their invitation to be on the show. Tonight, the real show starts as each women gets their first impression limo moment. Did anyone trip, say something stupid, or leave JuanP speechless? Check it out!

Before we get to see JuanP meet the women, we of course need the filler sections. First, Sean Lowe visits JuanP to give him some advice for meeting all these women. The most important part of their discussion? How do you go from making out with one girl to making out with another without anything in between. Well that’s a tough one, but my biggest question is how do these two guys even know each other? Are there secret Bachelor functions for all these people to meet up? Is it like a swinger party? Hey! It wouldn’t surprise me for this show… Anyway, back to the real show. They have their heart to heart and then Chris Harrison shows up to welcome him back to Bachelor Nation.

After some cute clips of JuanP and his daughter, he’s off to meet the women. Most of the limo impressions were a bit dull, unfortunately. A teacher gave him a gold star, he listened to Nikki’s heart beat, someone brought a dog, Lucy showed up barefoot, and Clare had a fake baby bump. Although the fake pregnancy was definitely the riskiest of the entrances, she got noticed and stayed in the competition for another week. Plus, JuanP seemed to like the look on her, so maybe he’ll be thinking about having more babies with her soon!

Amy J's weird massage
Amy J’s weird massage

During the cocktail party, Lauren H had a meltdown because she was running out of time for her one on one moment. Unfortunately, immediately bringing up a past relationship that only just ended in heartbreak and saying you’re “so over it” doesn’t end in a rose. She seemed nice, if a bit desperate for approval. Surprisingly, crazy girl Amy J was sent home after giving JuanP a massage while he was still in his suit. All we could think about here was how those oils she put on her hands were ruining his suit. Well, that and her sensual noises at massaging his hands. I don’t know if she could have made a weirder first impression.

The girl he did give his first impression rose to? Sharleen, the Canadian opera singer living in Germany. Her unimpressed reaction when he showed up with the coveted rose and her meek “sure” to accept it did not go lost on us. I understand you wouldn’t be in love with him yet, but if you’re not feeling it enough to get excited about being his top pick, I don’t know why you’re on the show. Maybe there’s someone else who is more deserving…

The final tally of who’s staying for next week: Sharleen (first impression), Alli, Amy L, Andi, Cassandra, Chantel, Chelsie, Christy, Clare, Danielle, Elise, Kat, Kelly, Lucy, Lauren S, Nikki, Renee, and Victoria.

Who do I think the frontrunners are? Well… Clare, Nikki, and Renee are up there, but it’ll take more time to know for sure.

We live tweet each episode on the west coast! Follow us @TheReviewWeekly to join the conversation!

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