The Bachelor shows the return of Nick’s baby dinosaur and a second, unforgettable, 2 on 1

Remember that ridiculous voodoo two on one date that completely disrespected the actual religious practices of many people? Well, it hasn’t ended yet. Taylor showed up to continue the horrible trend of returning after being sent home – only to be sent away again. Surprise surprise, Corinne left the two on one with her rose and nothing changed.

So now Rachel (1on1), Danielle M (group date), and Corinne (2on1) have roses heading into the rose ceremony…

Suddenly all the girls are emotional because no cocktail party means things are starting to get serious. And when things get serious, the minor girls get chopped. Unfortunately, that means my favourite silly girl Alexis is gone – and primed for some wonderful Bachelor in Paradise hijinks.

Roses: Rachel, Danielle M, Corinne, Kristina, Raven, Vanessa, Danielle L, Jasmine, and Whitney.

And then the girls head off to St. Thomas, the first gorgeous beach locale of the season. Nick’s opening journal focused on the excitement of being back in some beautiful islands and how great this place will be to fall in love. Anyone getting some goofy Bachelor in Paradise vibes here? He did this little shimmy thing, almost like he forgot he wasn’t on the fun show anymore.

I wish we got more time seeing the girls interacting in the house together because they always seem to be so friendly and having so much fun. Until a maid shows up who can do absolutely anything the women need because the producers didn’t know if they could stir up any more Corinne drama? WHY did we need to introduce the first St. Thomas local as the Raquel nanny replacement, though? Surprisingly, black women in the tropics aren’t all maids and housekeepers.

We didn’t get much of the day-date between Nick and Kristina, but we do get an almost unedited evening date conversation as she explains the whole story of her childhood and adoption. It’s emotional, but I really appreciated how Nick handled it. He asked questions and never seemed overwhelmed by the

Rachel, Raven, Vanessa, Corinne, Danielle M, and Jasmine get a beach volleyball date that still feels much more Bachelor in Paradise than The Bachelor… Until it all starts going downhill. But before that did anyone else see the return of the Baby Dinosaur thing from Paradise? Because that was pure gold. Vanessa doesn’t understand the point of the show, Jasmine gets a little aggressive in her group date frustrations, Corinne is drunk, and Danielle M is a little sad. Basically, the tumultuous weather pushed everyone into becoming emotional wrecks. Or the producers did, which is pretty much the same thing.

“If Jasmine was a vegetable, she would be a turnip. Because that girl is turned up!” So a few things: first, Raven is my favourite girl of the season; second, that is the best line I’ve probably heard all season. But once they get to the evening, Nick realises just how serious these problems are. Jasmine is going a little off the rails, saying she wants to punch him because he isn’t showing her any attention. And then she does go to jokingly choke him a few times while rambling about their connection, so he decides to send her home.

Only Whitney and Danielle L don’t have dates yet, so does that mean there’s another two on one this week? It does and hopefully, that makes people a little more wary of them – even after one has passed. Of course, it’s with two girls who I barely remembered were even on the show because there’s no drama or animosity between them. Anyone else realise how great that little spit of land would be to leave someone at the end of this date? They’ve chosen well, this time. None of these women are memorable, and I really couldn’t tell you anything that happened during either of their conversations. This was probably the smartest way to get rid of these people, but this two on one had absolutely no drama behind it.

At least it gets all the girls a little nervous back at the hotel so we can focus on something more interesting than a boring date with Danielle L. They reminisce about their first date – because they have nothing else to talk about, apparently. And then he ends it with her after she told him she’s falling in love with him. Now, if that isn’t a brutal way to end a relationship, I don’t know what is.

He arrives at the women’s hotel to explain his thought process, and really cry on all their shoulders. He wants it to work out, but it needs to be real and right and what if that doesn’t happen? The big concern: he doesn’t know if he can do this… but of course – it’s to be continued.

Roses: Kristina (1on1) and Raven (group).