Random Netflix Movie Night: Good Luck Chuck

Remember when Dane Cook was a thing in the 2000s? So back in that time, he came out with a few romantic comedies—just when I was really feeling romcoms. I never loved his movies, but I also can’t say I hated them that much. I thought of them as a bit of fun, he was kind of cute, and I frequently liked the girls starring in them. WELL, flash forward to today, when I decided to watch Good Luck Chuck and see what I think of it now and…

This is the worst freaking movie. Dane Cook is his normal self and that’s fine. His jokes are usually crude and sexual in nature. That’s fine—if you like his stand up specials then you’ll know what he’s all about. He plays a loveable doofus, basically. He really likes the girl and crowds her when he thinks she’ll fall for the next guy because of a silly curse from childhood. My only major problem with him is when he goes psycho in his pursuit of her. Suddenly, he’s obsessed and the only rational thing for the girl to do is to flee.

Despite his weird, sudden obsession, the main problem comes from the other two main characters in the movie.

Jessica Alba’s character is so brainless, there’s no way she would have been hired in her position. She likely wouldn’t even still be alive, for that matter (and I’m sure she’s killed someone by now, as well). In the course of two short interactions, Alba knocks over a waiter’s full tray, pours candle wax down the front of Cook’s pants, destroys her front teeth, causes a scalpel to be lodged in Cook’s back, drains the battery in her car, electrocutes Cook, rips her skirt off in a car door, ruins the convertible top of Cook’s car, locks herself out of her home—and that’s all before their first ‘date’. All of this is meant to be goofy, she’s overly enthusiastic about penguins, extremely clumsy, but also sexy so of course she’s the one, right? There is no depth to any character, and Alba’s role is the perfect example.

And Dan Fogler? Ugh, he is the grossest guy in this movie. There isn’t much to say about him, he’s just horribly unpleasant and disgustingly abrasive in his failed attempts to pick up women. His objectification of women seems intended as a foil to Cook, but it instead places the movie in a competitive spiral to see how low they can take it. In love with a woman solely because she has three breasts? Done. Masturbated into a fruit? Of course. Objectifying your female patients when they come in for medical procedures and bringing your friends in to ogle? Why not.

Why did I watch this movie again? The classic romcom ending wasn’t even good, because there’s very little redemption in any of the characters. Cook basically continues to pursue her but suddenly, after a little break, Alba’s happy for him to be pursuing her again? For no reason, Fogler gets to end up happy with a woman who’s comfortable exposing herself to anyone he tells her to.

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